The Emoji Movie looks absolutely πŸ’©



I can’t believe there was a bidding war for this. But I can believe that Sony are exactly the type of people that would bid for it. These are the people who essentially gave Spider-Man back to Marvel, might be losing James Bond and couldn’t even keep Adam Sandler from transferring to Netflix. What’s more incredible is that Sony don’t even believe in this piece ofΒ πŸ’© enough to market it like it matters to them. We’re introduced to it by a literal \_(γ‚·)_/Β―, who even admits that it’s a piece ofΒ πŸ’© – which is later confirmed, in person, by an actual πŸ’©. I ASK YOU! At this stage, it’s unclear whether the vertical aspect ratio is just a down-with-it marketing gimmick or if this is actual movie footage that has no respect for the cinematic form. This film should not be widely released. It should be straight to mobile devices, because that’s clearly where it belongs. And OH LOOK, IT’S IN 3D. Which is just what I want from a vertical film about flat people.

Good God, no.

Please don’t see this film. Because that will just send a message to Hollywood that they should make more of thisΒ πŸ’©. If Hollywood are going to get better, they need to hit rock bottom. And this might just be it. Please – I beg of thee – save your money on something else.

Transformers: The Last Knight is looking pretty good, isn’t it?

Author: the Purple Prose Mage

I'm not Batman, but I wish that I were.

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